MARCH 2010 The War Issue

Cover illustration by Warren Popelier

FEZ Sez.................................................................Circusmouse
'WAR-Fi'............................................................................Zed
'WW4'................................................Zed + The Flat Earth Society
'FINKELSTEIN'S MONSTER'...........................................Munky Harris
'X-WORD'...................................................................crassnsilly
'AMUSED TO DEATH'..................................................Dave Schwan
'MADE in WAR'............................................................crassnsilly
'THE WAR ON BLAKE NELSON'...............................................Mej D
'CINEMA in WAR'..................................................Craig Middleton

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Contributors
Munky Harris, Dave Schwan, crassnsilly, Zed + The Flat World Society,
Craig Middleton, Mej D & Circusmouse.

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We tend to think of science fiction as a modern genre, but it dates back as far as 2AD, check out Lucian’s tale, True History. Of course, we’ve all heard of modern-day luminaries like HG Welles, Arthur C Clarke and Russell T Davies, but humans have always looked farther than the confines of this little blue dot of a planet to the deepest recesses of space as a source of fascination.
Some may have it that sci-fi illustrates a positive, benign future for mankind (FEZ can’t think of any, can you?), but we think the vast majority of sci-fi hinges around war and destruction. With classics such as Star Wars, Transformers and Star Trek showing alien butt getting firmly kicked and mankind hooning across the galaxy, FEZ asks why can’t we be making alien love instead of alien war. Shouldn’t this stuff be dubbed war-fi instead of sci-fi?? Inter-planetary violence fills the books we read and the movies we watch, and it has leeched into kids’ toys and games. The fact that science fiction has become science fact - for example the Star Trek Communicator as the precursor of the mobile phone - means constant warfare has been pencilled in as human destiny.
So if future social and technological advancements, such as robotics, space travel and global communications, have come to fruition because of sci-fi, then we should be shitting one mighty brick if the forecast for the coming years is anything like what’s been shown in District Nine and Avatar.
The future is now, and there’s a target on the back of our heads with a bloody great laser beam pointing right at it.

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WW4

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US advertisement for a military robot: These robots’ are amazing, they don’t complain, we can have them do anything we want, they are not scared, this robot has no fear, which is a good supplement to the US army.
WITH war in Afghanistan kicking off like Joe Hockey in a pie shop and killing zones flaring up across the Middle East and north Africa, the US military is turning to robots on today’s battlefields. This is great news for US hawks, who see humans as the weak link in military planning: give the generals a machine any day, outside the boundaries of the Geneva Convention and human rights.
The most blood-curdling robot creation of recent months is EATR. Developed by president of Robotic Technology Inc, Robert Finklestein, EATR (Energetically Autonomous Tactical Robot) is funded by the Pentagon’s development arm. It is a robot land steamer that fuels itself by scavenging upon the battlefield. Armed with a robotic grab and chainsaw, it forages for food, while on long-range reconnaissance missions into enemy territory. Its first choice of fuel are trees and bushes, but when the ashen grey wasteland is bereft of living matter, EATR will loot conventional fuel supplies, like domestic gas cylinders and petrol from the tanks of cars. Should all else fail, it turns to roadkill like stray cats, dogs and farm animals; flesh in other words.
When pressed for an answer on the BBC about whether EATR would add humans to its menu, Finklestein hesitated, before saying that if it developed a liking for human flesh, then he would implement a product recall. So, that’s all OK then in Finklestein’s mind; a product recall, just as if EATR were a rogue Prius with a dodgy foot pedal. From machines gone bad in movie Terminator to the real-life robot anti-aircraft gun that went berserk at a South African airshow in 2007 and sprayed the crowd with machine gun fire killing nine bystanders, robots can, and do, malfunction.
With warfare entering frightening new territory, and as the US intends one-third of its vehicles to be driverless in five years, the head-long rush to develop EATR, Finklestein’s locust-like monster, goes on unabated.
It won’t be a case of if EATR eats humans, but when it does, which leaves a big question hanging over our heads: how endless warfare and human-munching machines came to be accepted as the way forward for humanity, especially under the watch of Nobel Peace Prize-winning president Obama.

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X-WORD

Click on image for larger version
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For as long as we have walked the planet, so too has conflict. Fighting and arguing appear to be innate to humanity, particularly from the male perspective. Although women have, do and shall continue to make excellent fighters, this side of life is usually reserved for men. We start young, too. Little boys in all cultures can be found running about shooting at each other, playing variations of ' cops and robbers'. Occasionally, politically correct parents may attempt to deter this type of play but in the end boys will be boys. I recall a period in the mid 70's when my mum went through a phase of hiding my toy guns and my auntie banned her son, my cousin, from reading my comics, Captain America and The Hulk in particular. She claimed that they would turn us into juvenile delinquents. She was right too, though I doubt that comics were to blame. Throughout history, from the gladiators fighting to the death for the amusement of their countrymen right up to the 3-D battles in this years' summer blockbuster, 'Avatar', there has always been something very basic, primordial even, surrounding warfare, killing and dying that both scares and thrills our senses, tempting us to return for more.
Australia is an example of a country in which militarism combined with nationalism has come to play a large part in the identity of our relatively new country. Originally coming from much Anglo-Saxon stock, the majority of initial settlers being criminals and with a history of invasive colonisation, we wanted to prove that we were not just scum. After taking this country by force we continued to jump on the bandwagon in support of other peoples' wars. This led to the creation of the ANZAC and the related baggage. Loyalty, mateship, death and glory, it all, supposedly, forms a good part of our collective psyche. With so much violence in our blood it is hardly surprising that we look to warfare for our entertainment as well. Along with the sense of fear, awe and wonder at warfare, there is the spectacle, the colour and sound, the pomp and ceremony attached to marches, parades and the like. The Edinburgh Military Tattoo is a prime example of all of the above combined into an entertainment extravaganza. There is no blood, bullets, mud or death to be seen, just an orgy of militarism. The Superpowers, China, Russia and the USA, as well as some smaller countries all continue to hold large parades where the men and machines of war are blatantly displayed in a show of force and of pride in their military prowess. After the marching comes the fighting, and as soon as a war kicks off, so to does the entertainment potential. The media starts churning out books, comics, films, documentaries, cup and saucer sets and a multitude of other products, many pure propaganda, to remind us of the wonders of war, to empty our pockets and often to divert our attention from the ugly truths behind the fighting. With the introduction of television into our homes, the average person was suddenly presented with images and sound direct from the battlefield, both as news and as entertainment propaganda. In the case of the Vietnam War, this new technology did as much to aid the anti-war movement as it did to keep us informed and on side. But those in power soon learned that with careful control, censorship and management in place, a more sanitised version of reality can be fed to the people with their evening meal, shot from a distance, with colourful explosions and calm voiceovers and no blood or body bags in sight.
Losing the war in Vietnam has had a huge impact on the American people, such that it can still be felt today. This has been responsible for a huge number of books, TV shows and movies. The returned Vietnam veteran became a staple of the industry, appearing in too many instances to count, amongst them Taxi Driver, First Blood and The Exterminator. Other examples of the response to losing the war or of the fantasy of refighting and winning are Apocalypse Now, Platoon, Hamburger Hill, Full Metal Jacket, The Green Berets, Missing In Action 1 and 2, Rambo-First Blood 2, Uncommon Valour, Go Tell The Spartans, Jacobs Ladder and many more (I apologise if I missed out your favourite Nam flick but this list was off the top of my head and is far from complete). The Vietnam experience would, along with WW2, probably be the best example of a war being turned into a, yet to be completed, entertainment industry. Recently, the public, wanting more bang for their bucks, were presented with the concept of the 'imbedded journalist' during the Iraq campaign. Events came across as exciting docu-dramas where you could 'meet' the guys involved and even listen to their favourite hip hop and metal soundtrack as they shot up the enemy. This was war as pure entertainment. We film the movie as we fight the war. Reality blurs and it can all feel like the latest video game. In fact after the war and the book deals, the documentaries and the Oprah interviews, after the movie and the sequel comes the video game!
Call of Duty--Modern Warfare 2. This is the shit. This little beauty made millions. It is the thrill of the kill packaged for the gamer generation. And his dad. As far as things go at the moment, this is the pinnacle of Warfare as Entertainment. You and your mates get to, from the safety of your living room, fight your own war, killing the enemies of freedom without consequences. Although I do not subscribe to the theory that such games create real life killers, I do realise what a strange race of creatures we have become to want to 'play' such games in the first place. We have developed from the cave dweller who painted of his adventures on the wall of his home, to the sports fan who watches his team play at ritualised warfare on the sports field, to the child sitting in his room pressing the button on the latest nuclear war simulation. You have to wonder what comes next from a society that sells war to its children as entertainment.

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WAR – what is it good for? Lots, actually. The jet engine, the computer and powdered egg are just three of the marvelous inventions, which were developed through necessity during World War II. The greatest of this world-changing trio is powdered egg. Imagine if you are single and planning a dinner party for yourself.
Most recipes are for four people, so a single person must divide all ingredients given by four. Easy with 100 grams of treacle, say, or a pint of crème de menthe. But how does one divide three or five eggs by four? You can’t crack a quarter of an egg. But with powdered egg, the problem disappears, just like your friends did when you last served them that powdered egg, treacle and crème de menthe soufflé.
Powdered egg gave rise to many developments in the field of reconstituted food. Polar explorers and astronauts, equipped with freeze-dried foods, could give thanks to those who had contributed to early research in Britain, while enemy planes dropped bombs above their heads (or 10,000 miles away for those in Australia, who turned up for a fight anyway, even though it was unlikely that Hitler’s armies would march into Sydney). This eventually led to that zenith of reconstitutable foodstuffs, the Pot Noodle.
Speaking of astronauts, they would all be out of a job if it wasn’t for the necessity of saving our lives and freedom. Nothing concentrates the mind better than impending death, so both sides concentrated their minds to invent and refine.
Frank Whittle’s work on jet engines throughout World War II undoubtedly helped the eventual Allied victory. Without Whittle’s work, there would be no jet airliners, cheap foreign holidays or space travel. Many more inventions came with the demands of space travel, not least the pen, which can write upside down. Thank you, Herr Hitler.
And jet travel and space exploration would not have been possible without the computer, no matter what you may have learned from Wallace & Gromit. British engineers working at Bletchley Park developed the Colossus machine, which cracked Germany’s Enigma code. This most valuable of developments ruined Germany’s secret communications and in turn gave us the personal computer, enabling millions around the world the power to communicate, the ability to tell anybody, anywhere on the planet that you have just made a cup of tea. Millions died, but millions more now know that you had a biscuit to go with that cup of tea.
World War II ended with nuclear attack. Thousands more died, but millions more benefited from the technology, allowing us all the wonder of nuclear power and smug environerds to wear T-shirts saying “Nuclear Power – no thanks!”
Penicillin, antibiotics, radar, the Rolling Stones, the list of good things that came out of World War II goes on, all wondrous innovations which have improved the lives of future generations. We may have been able to survive as a race without many of them, thanks to the single-minded inventors and the millions who laid down their lives for liberty, but at least we will be able to post that last Tweet: “Not feeling too well.”

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The war on Blake Nelson started a week after he moved into Peacock Close, in the quiet township of Cardwell, North Queensland. The Iraq war veteran was a recluse from the day he arrived. He rarely answered the door, was never seen leaving the house and ignored his neighbours. His house was dark and quiet, much like his personality. It was set back from the street, the windows were shrouded by overgrown bushes and shrubs and it was one of only three homes on the cul-de-sac that backed on to a reserve, making it even more isolated.
Aside from young Joey Donlon, who disappeared days before (and everyone but the parents knew the 16 year old took off to Brisbane), nothing much happened on the quiet Close.
That is, until Nelson came along.
There were repeated, and failed, attempts by the neighbours to meet him. Few saw him, and those that did described him as being skinny and in his 40s with shoulder length gray hair, a shrunken body and tattoos covering his arms and neck. Even the kids avoided his front yard, preferring to walk on the road rather than step on his lawn. The only child who was ever seen in his yard was 4-year-old Sarah, and that was the day she disappeared. Her house was next door to Nelson’s and the day she went missing her mum last saw her playing with her pink ball in the back yard, running back and forth between the unfenced properties. That was at 9.30am Friday. She raised the alarm that Sarah was missing at 10.30am and minutes later the neighbourhood was in a frenzy. The police and SES arrived and the search began. At 7pm, the search had to be called off for the night.
"I just know that fucken creep next door had something to do with it, " Sarah’s dad Billy bellowed later that night as the family gathered. “I didn’t like the fucken looks of the prick from the start. And who knows if young Jason really went to Brissy. l bet that asshole Nelson had something to do with his disappearance too.”
As Billy’s rage erupted, he and his brothers decided to confront Nelson. “l’ll beat the fucken shit out of him if Sarah’s there,” Billy yelled as they charged over to Nelson’s house.
The violence started the moment Nelson answered the door knock and the brothers busted their way in, and Billy burst into a fury, yelling and punching Nelson, demanding to know about Sarah. The punches were savage. The first in the stomach crippled Nelson over, the second in the jaw almost knocked him senseless. The third blow, to his right temple, was the one that instantly killed him. “He fucken deserves to rot in hell,” Billy screeched as they stormed out after searching unsuccessfully for Sarah.
At first light the next morning the police arrived. Billy’s wife thought it was to resume the search. Billy thought it was about Nelson’s death. Neither were prepared for the shock when they opened the door. There stood Sarah, looking sheepish, ruffled, and clutching her pink ball. “It seems she got lost in the reserve out the back of your house,” one of the officers said. “You just never know what kids will get up to, eh. Shame you didn’t get Nelson next door to help. I heard he was the head of army search and rescue in Iraq, a real hero.”

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In the year 2024 the most important thing which the cinema will have helped to accomplish will be that of eliminating from the face of the civilized world all armed conflict. With the use of the universal language of moving pictures the true meaning of the brotherhood of man (sic) will have been established throughout the earth.
—D.W. Griffith, (Film Director) 1924.

Sadly the above hasn’t materialized yet. We now must assume that man cannot learn from the past, but we must never stop reminding ourselves, and War films mostly do this better than any other medium.
Traditionally, World War II movies are straightforward in their execution, no other enemy has symbolized such pure evil as the Nazi’s did; one recent digression being Black Book (2006).
War has provided backdrops for some great films, particularly Westerns, favourites being Sam Peckinpah’s The Wild Bunch (1969), Sergio Leone’s The Good, The Bad and The Ugly (1966) and A Fistful of Dynamite (1971...best film ever!).
Vietnam still casts a shadow over America’s conscience, recent recommendations being The Fog of War (2003), the no-star 1968 Tunnel Rats (2008). Forget Nixon/Frost (2008), watch the actual interview (1977) as Nixon apologizes to the world. When will Bush do the same?
Modern warfare has been scrutinized in the recently popular genre, the documentary: Michael Moore’s Fahrenheit 911 (2004), Standard Operating Procedure (2008) and Battle for Haditha (2007). However, documentary does not equal complete actual truth, (see Michael Moore), no matter how good intentions may be! This style has been incorporated into recent films such as Redacted (2007) to harrowing effect.
The Hurt Locker (2009) focuses on the ‘buzz’ of war and shares Oscar nominations with Quentin Tarintino’s Inglourious Basterds (2009), another war movie but of a completely different style. This film is a reworking of history in which the power of Cinema, literally and metaphorically, is the Nazi’s downfall. I would prefer the latter to win something, we all know war is bad. Tarantino’s triumph can reinforce that war can be used to tell a story in so many different and interesting ways.

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EXTRA CONTENT....

Soldier's Dream by Wilfred Owen

I dreamed kind Jesus fouled the big-gun gears;
And caused a permanent stoppage in all bolts;
And buckled with a smile Mausers and Colts;
And rusted every bayonet with His tears.

And there were no more bombs, of ours or Theirs,
Not even an old flint-lock, not even a pikel.
But God was vexed, and gave all power to Michael;
And when I woke he'd seen to our repairs.
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Alternative WW4 from Zed + The Flat Earth Society

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FEZ next month:
"WORK"
Well, that's 12 months in the bag. Join us "at the office" as we embark on another year of fun, fact, fiction and fuck. If you have a great idea for the next issue of FEZ, send it in for your chance to win a prize.

Congrats to the cleaning lady for last month's great cover. She received a mystery prize from Seduction. Have fun with that, Ethel.

Contributions to:-
fez@randompress.com.au